renovation progress....sorry no pic

this week

- acid washing....finally see a clean floor tiles...no sand, no dirt...

- varnish parquet....hope they do a good job.

hob, hood, oven, kitchen & toilet accessories to be delivered by this week.

i like this moment...it's 1.19am....supposed to sleep but i only have this moment...to sit down quietly without having to run ard, busy with the boys. i like dim light, and oh yes! air con :D

not thinking....just looking ard the room...big and small boys are sleeping...only if i could do this every night and without affecting my next day, i would do every night. but physically i don't think can take it. when move to new home finally, maybe this time, i'm still busy cleaning and clearing up the mess in our new home. i don't dare to think what will happen when move to new home...can i cope with 3 boys? can i go back to the days when my boys sleep by 10pm instead of 11ish now? the whole world is hoping i get a helper, who would understand how much i value privacy? but am i too selfish to just think of myself and not taking grandparents in law into consideration?

i hope i don't have to yell and cane my boys everyday...i hope i can be a better mother. is there a better way of parenting? i'm happy to have lunch with friends today, nathan behaves well, sit on the chair (without buckle him up) and just let me talk and listen. thank God for him.

i wish time stops ticking....am not ready for tomorrow. when tomorrow comes, i try to set good examples, i try to be a better and gentle wife, be more respectful to my in laws.

preparing breakfast for boys, cleaning hands and mouth, bathing e boys, feeding lunch, preparing ian to go to school, dabao or lunch out, make nathan sleeps, bring ian bk from school, make ian naps, jonathan's up, play with him...go to playground, bath the boys, feed nathan dinner, scold ian eat faster...preparing for bedtime, clean up the boys...bedtime story...11ish. next day...start again.

Jesus, please help me...to remember You in my daily activities with the boys...i always forget You.

good night

renovation progress

ohhhh woh wohh!!! i love my wall color. it's quite hard to imagine how the wall will turn out to be from a small color sample...glad turn out well. we decided on the wall color weeks ago...but on painting day, we found out there's a curve beam in the living room that makes it hard to join from wall to wall. even right up to the very day, still can't decide how to match the color. thank God jem suggested to hack that curve beam and use mostly white for wall, only use darker brown at the tv area (our tv will be near the window, see picture below)...our id suggested to extend the color to the next wall. we heed his advice. though it is just a base coat for the whole house, i absolutely glad to make that decision...can't wait to see when the actual painting complete towards hand over day.

they removed all the corrugated papers and plastic today, for the 1st time, i can see our floor tiles...nice nice nice! it makes the house look spacious. check out my cream white door and fan

one of the boys room...blue room

4-mth old jonathan

letting ian carry jonathan without support for the 1st time

who's going to school???

good night

can we live without tv? i believe we can...

how abt me? for the sake of my boys, i'll try to minimise and be selective. i don't mind playing the same programmes everyday. my boys', esp nathan recent favourite is watching kids singing bible songs. nathan always ask "i wan bobo song" when he wakes up each morning. each day repeats at least 4 times...there's 17 songs each cycle. because it's God-related, i'm more than willing to let them watch, although i already feel a lil 'xian' already.

but if staying with other family members with different beliefs, it's tough to control what the boys are watching at times. as most of you know, boys/men are visual people...i've never know abt this visual thingy till i learnt from church and ever since then, i started to observe people, just to find out how true is it, so whenever i'm at the mrt station or anywhere...whenever i see ladies with good figure, esp those who like to 'bang bua liap', i'll look at men who passes by...very easy to spot...can see their eyes look straight down straight down then straight straight straight...then down....it's human nature...simply can't resist.

we're living in a fallen world, i know it's hard to protect my boys from all this influence, if i can control tv channels at home, i can't control influence from outside. if i can, if i'm smart, if i have the support, i would choose home-schooling, but i don't have. so i can only pray for God's protection.
whenever there's scene showing sexy women, kissing scene, even slight r-rated, i'll try to distract my boys...i can't change or switch the tv off when everybody else is watching.

my in laws like to watch miss world...pretty ladies, with luscious figure. my boys were making lots of noise, they were playing sword, fight fight fight!!! jumping on the sofa, fight fight fight. then when the show started, all the ladies with swimsuit...no noise all the sudden! i was using the comp and when i turned to look at my boys...both in pause mode....ian was watching the tv with his mouth open. i blocked him, he shifted left, i blocked left, he shifted right...his eyes simply glued to the tv...to some, no big deal, but to me....it is.

always have unending worries for kids...

kitchen - white

ceiling fan - white

room doors - close to white

floor tiles - white

window grilles - white

wrought iron gate - silverish

in future, if my washing machine and fridge break down, new one will be white...

cleaning?....sure.....my face will turn white white ....

i kena suan by jem all the time....coz whatever we discussed and agreed together, ended up all changed and according to my preference. almost the entire home color were decided by me. kitchen worktop supposed to settle for black galaxy granite...but i changed my mind to lighter color solid surface. as for the kitchen cabinet color, supposed to be open to his suggestion, having the kitchen cabinet brown in color, but decided creamy white. ceiling fan supposed to be kdk silverish fan, matching our dining lights...but because shop owner said kdk fan only has 3 blades, some people complained no wind....i decided an uglier design 5 bladed fan and in white again.

so should anything go wrong...easy, cozai will be suan for the next few years.

i don't know why i wanted a built in oven so much (maybe i know)...what will happen to my newly bought table top rowenta oven which serves me well? just because i'm going to have a new kitchen and have that space to add in built in oven...i insisted to have one. when i was studying in perth, we've got a built in oven, my sis and i used it to roast chicken wings, pork ribs all the time. i really like the spacious interior. so again, kena suan by jem for wasting money buying that table top (didn't expect to sell our home mahhh *lame excuse*), now become white elephant. he's right....and now...i wish my in laws' one break down soon so that i can give it to them. theirs is a $70 cornell oven come with rottiserie function...all the yummy scones, butter cake, chicken wings, quiche, whole chicken (used turnspit, gosh, the meat turns out very succulent), cheesebaked minced beef spaghetti come from there....so my lesson learnt from the liang household is i don't need a 'professional' stuff to have yummy effect. $70 also can achieve that.

having said that...there are other areas decided by jem...*feeling bad after changing so many things, so better give in to other areas*. wallpaper, wall color, internal structure of the wardrobe and pantry, sanitary wares, to keep existing parquet in all rooms...etc.

lighting are up last week...left with living and balcony area.

painting and sanitary installation (wc, basin, heater, shower set, mixer) will be completed by this coming week

carpentry, not yet...another 2++ week.

can't wait to see the outcome...

2 weeks passed since jem's relative, william went to the Lord.

i don't know whether ppl who went 'home' can appear in dreams of loved ones or speak to them...but if the Lord allows so, it certainly brings comfort to family.

i heard this from recent gathering...from his sister's sharing...saying that his wife, wendy dreamt of him, sat on his lap and chatted, she saw that he looked well...she woke up from her dream when he said he needs to get up.

his eldest daughter rachel dreamt of him too. she's so happy to see her father when back from school, he looked well.

his brother, steven. while he's crying over his brother's departure in his home, he suddenly hear him saying "don't be silly, i'm well". i was very touched when i heard this.

his son, ryan blogged about this...if want to, you might want to read... http://www.light-spirit.blogspot.com/
to me, there's always hope in God's family...i know for sure we'll see our loved ones again one day. reminds of me ah bo...miss her...but i know she's doing extremely well up there. i'll see her again :D

sorry for not been updating...ian fall sick 2 weeks ago, then i fall sick last week and now...seems like my father in law kena this week. am still recovering and much much better.

renovation progress

can't see living floor tiles, all layed over by corrugated paper.

all the floor and wall tiling all over the house - done
L box - up
new windows - done
new grilles - not yet
electrical - replaced all old casing and some rewiring....will need to do another round again maybe after carpentry work.

we shopped for kitchen and bathroom fittings last weekend...hopefully have all these install by next week. this week is running hot & cold piping and painting :D so cement and tiling related stuff will be cleared...ooh hooo!!!

couldn't sleep tonight...

am fearful...another relative passed away all the sudden last monday.

to us, is sudden coz he kept it from all his relatives even till the end of his day. only his immediate family knew abt it. he's got mouth cancer, found it one year ago, and now...he passed away at home and left 4 very young children and wife behind. but the good news is he accepted Christ the night before he passed away.

as we get older, we're getting more news of ppl falling sick, passed away...and there's another one...we got to know him in perth, one of our church friends. i don't normally look at the obituary section, but often when i do, 2 times i 'happen' to see familiar faces. he died of cardiac arrest, wife was pregnant with #2. i simply imagine myself if i encounter this, i'll be devastated...it's so sudden.

i just learnt this word 遺憾 from the taiwanese series recently. based on my own interpretation, it means do whatever you want to or must do while you live, so when you die, you won't regret or can go in peace.

i always think, wait till all my boys are independent enough, then start to do the things i wanted to do....then here comes the question...

do what?
i once listed down the things i wanted to do.
- be a good cook, want all my boys and my man tell ppl, my mom's/wife's cooking is very good.

all food related yeah? so far, always kena suan by jem for buying all the 'professional' kitchen stuff, but some of the outcome was so lousy that he dare not eat. the challenge here is not about trying...it's abt how to finish all the 'dare not eat' or 'not so nice' food. can you imagine if i bake 12 muffins, he eats only 1, i gotta finish the remaining 11? ok, if my boys like it, they like only 1 day...ate 2-3...i still have to finish another 8.

what else?...other than food

other than busy with the boys, i think i've been living quite an aimless life.

come to think of it, my aim in life is all my boys accept Christ as their personal Savior. you know, i always forgot God. i forgot to say grace, forgot to pray, when in need, ask Him for help and forget about Him the next min. no wonder my boys don't know who Jesus is. only ian knows a bit coz he's attending a christian-based kindy.

so...my only non-food related aim in life now is to pray earnestly for my children and to have them all accept God!

i gotta think of other things too....jem said once our boys grow up, i'll sure be very lonely and lost...it's true....

any place i want to go? to a place where it has fields of colorful tulips...and i just sit there as long as i want, to look at its beauty...

this is a super tough one...be a proverbs 31 wife to jem.

maybe another aim is to back to active in church days...
so if i achieve all these, will i feel 遺憾? i don't know...but for sure, if my children loves Jesus...definitely no 遺憾.

good night....