took the pic this morning, let you have a preview...how your child reads newspaper in future.am feeling tired (but refuse to rest) after facing the comp for entire morning.in my 31 week now (oh God, the day is nigh!!!). just told jem last night that i'm feeling as though i'm going to pop soon. yeah, only 31 weeks, baby better don't come out yet coz not fully developed...but i started to feel tired easily nowadays, more braxton hicks, tummy very bloated, have pressure 'under' once a while, ian is getting more demanding and tantrum throwing and nathan is very merciless to me, stretching every inch of my tummy to the best of his ability nowadays.my mom in law is suggesting us to have maid...again. if my mom in law is a christian, she can be a prayer warrior, very persistent in asking :). can understand her concern but think having maid is not an option for us right now. don't want to make any explanation here (simply tired), all i ask is pray for me (more strength) when the little one pops out.
reading one of my frequently access forum (Asia Parent), came across this mother who contributes quite a lot in the forum and i saw her blog address. she's a christian, mother of 6 children (just gave birth to #6)...yeah!!! 6!!!! in singapore!!!! and i just read 4-5 of her latest entries (going to read more)...very encouraging. you should read her latest birthing experience! funny i tell you!
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/MamaLim
oh yeah, didn't attend church today, jem is having service in bedside baptist church, whereas i'm having quiet time (ian is playing with my in laws, i'm reading and updating blogs, forums, cnet site, email all at one go). jem came home at 5am+ (yeah, no mistake, is am) on saturday and he's been feeling tired the entire weekend. hate to miss church but well, what else to say, we missed.
i started baking this week...but don't intend to give anyone. it's a failed product...why? papa jem has no comment on the cake except one "the cream cheese taste funny"....yeah...i baked carrot cake because want to 'akachi' with neighbours. then later found out the cream cheese has expired 3 months ago (shocking!!!). ian loves the cake when it fresh out from oven, ate quite a lot...thank God didn't give him the cream cheese :P.
don't worry, if i ever give YOU any cake, i have a quality control (papa jem) to go through eh :P
counting down...
next 2 weeks, will be in my 8th month pregnancy. nathan moves a lot, probably because ian is occupying his territory when i'm carrying ian. feeling some stomach hardening any time of the day too, think they called it "braxton hicks"...it's contraction but not the true labor kind. will be moving in to my in laws' place in the last month of my pregnancy, just in case my water bag burst, there's transport to get there and have someone takes care of ian when i'm not around.
just looking back when i was having aussieland holiday last month, i left ian for the 1st time with the sweet loving volunteers to take care in zion praise harvest. yeah, we left our babies, toddlers there, so that parents can concentrate in the sunday service. i was very reluctant to leave him initially, coz first of all, i've never done that before and i was worried that ian would cry out for me and they can't reach me. my sis, diana encouraged me to give it a try and some times i guess it's good to 'let go'. even after reaching church, was still reluctant, but decided to try. interestingly, each child is given a code, e.g. ian's code is V001. should they can't handle ian and he's inconsolable, they will display the code on the powerpoint during service (just a small print at the bottom left of the screen, only parents know what it means). yeah, i left him to the caregiver in the first week, listening to sermon and kept on checking, to see if the code appeared on the screen throughout the service.....then the 2nd week, i did the same thing. ian coped very well, except the 3rd week. ian was really looking out for me then and there's nothing the caregivers can do to comfort him...
now that, jem is in his new job, hope his working hours better, so that he can spend more time with ian. then i can stay in hospital in peace without worrying about this little boy.
cozai: "ian, call daddy"
ian: "babaaaaaa"
cozai: "ian, call mommy"
ian: "babaaaaaa"
cozai: "no no no, not babaaa, mommmmmmy, mommmmy"
ian: "babaaaaa"
cozai: "ian, call grandpa"
ian: "babaaaaaa"
cozai: "call grandma"
ian: "babaaaaaa"
cozai: ....
my mom in law once met this little 13-month old boy and his granny at the bus interchange. he already know how to speak many words.
mom in law: "where is daddy mommy?"
boy: "work"
mom in law: "A for?"
boy: "apple"
mom in law: "B for?"
boy: "ball"
mom in law: "P for?"
boy: "pen"
she was so impressed!!! 13-month only!!! she shared that with me when she got home and wonder why ian (now 18-month) still hasn't started talking and ever since then she started the "A for apple" "B for ball"...with ian till now. our little ian has very short attention span, before reaching to "D for"...he walked away...or close the book. ian is good at signing...not the proper signing lah, he come out with his own sign language and most of the time he just say "uhmmmm!!!! uhmmmm!!!! uhmmmmmm!!!!" only close family members can understand what he's doing. i try not to worry about his speaking, coz each child has their own development milestone. some walk first, some speak earlier than others...whatever it is, i don't want to compare and stress ian out (myself too), anyway, there's no way to force him either. diana taught me to speak to him in simple english, like start with one or two words than one sentence..."ian, ball" than "ian, go and get the ball" (something like that). am doing that now (though still tend to speak full sentence most of the time). maybe ian is like his mom, lazy to talk :P
oh! did i mention i went for retail therapy? bought tops from clarke quay new shopping centre (called "central?"). very retro looking and i love it! joyce (jem's sis) is into retro outfits and she looks so nice wearing it. influenced by her, coz she really look good at it. want to buy more of these in days to come! yay!!!
alright, this definitely freak me out...so am going to share with you!
i was preyed upon....
think it was tuesday this week....i had my usual marketing in the morning...and a guy just popped out and asking me "how do i get to queenstown?" in cantonese. told him it's pretty long journey to go queenstown from here (sengkang), advised him to take taxi instead...and of course, he asked me about certain bus numbers in our area, where do all the bus go to...i can't answer him though, i hardly take bus nowadays.
then guess what, he asked for my contact number!!! i was like...urh....(i'm ABOUT to give him mine ok, coz am just thinking he may need help if he get lost but of course, am hesitated about it). think he saw my blur face and said "you can't even remember your number" and change topic...
conversation did not stop, EQ low like me kept on chatting with him...he said he came from hong kong, on temporary renovation contract work...will be back when his job is done. my first thought was ... (oh he's a foreigner, don't mind sharing more if he wants to know more abt singapore, so toot right??!!)...he asked about where's the nearest kopitiam? how much is the conservancy charges? do i have a car (getting personal here), how many room flat am i staying (shucks!!! i told him i'm staying 4-room) and which level i'm staying in (shucks shucks shucks!!! i told him which floor too....but pointed to different block!...urh...still don't feel safe). you know what's the statement he made freak me out?
he said "wah, you stay so high floor, fall down sure die"
it was then i know something not quite right and i started to move away...slowly...i made sure he made his way to the main road, then i walked to the lift with ian on his pram.
prayed very hard for protection throughout the day mannnn!!! had never felt so insecure and fearful! coz should anything happen...i'm totally in a defenseless situation, am pregnant and with a very young toddler.
told jem when he was back to bangkok the next day...he said better to offend people than compromise safety. people like the so called hong kong guy are good at keeping conversation going in order to find out more information about you. jem prayed with me that night and claim some word of God to assure God's protection on me. i couldn't sleep well the entire night, coz the thought of kena as a target really scares me! and i kept on claiming the verse the entire night till my body can't take it anymore, then i started to sleep ...probably around 4ish in the morning.
felt better the next morning...but didn't leave house for 2 days (but had good time with ian at home). started to go out again after that and my eyes couldn't stop scanning around...and will 'mess up my routine' from that day onwards.
shared that with my neighbour and we agreed to go out together than alone all the time. am going to get to know all my neighbours...friend friend yeah!!! haha!! will resume my baking adventure to break ice with them. i just gave my neighbour muffins that week too...will give other neighbours as well. not just desserts lah!!! savoury as well...pizza??!!! tarts? quiches? (yeah!!! hope i have the time when nathan comes...i doubt so but try)
i had a wonderful moments with my boy this week. still feel as though i didn't give enough...haha, i guess this is probably very common among mothers...
it's never enough :P
ian has been enjoying all of my attention and will soon have to share with his brother. i don't know whether you know what i'm saying...as mother, am feeling guilty as the birthing date is approaching. not that i don't welcome nathan, i'm sure i'll love him just as much as i have for ian. just that, ian's life won't be the same anymore...as much as i want to give him all my attention, i can't.
then i read my usual forum...this m4m forum...and a mother share a poem that reflects exactly how i feel and apparently a lot of mothers of 2 (to be) responded to that poem... very touching.
http://www.bellybelly.com.au/articles/baby/loving-two-children
anyway, i can't help to say this.
"ian, mommy loves you very much!!! i love you and nathan very much!"
